It took me all of yesterday and a little of today but I finally created a Face book page!
https://www.facebook.com/survivingasuicideloss
Speaking of fear, it is a great place to start. Suicide of a loved one brings fear to just about everything. The fear is caused by anxiety and the anxiety is caused by experiencing a trauma. It is normal it is supposed to happen, it is your mind protecting itself. It is normal but it is not a good way to live as it will paralyze you and could ruin every aspect of your life. The thing is, you have to change it. It will not be easy and it will take time but it is possible.
I will use one of my early fears as an example: After Joseph's death I was afraid to take a shower when no one was home. What?! Why!?!? Who knows I have no idea, I thought I was going to die if I took a shower when I was alone (truth). One particular day I felt super gross, so I decided to go for it. I am still here I did not die in the shower that day or any day since then. Baby steps, baby steps, baby steps!!!!
I still fear a lot of things but now i just think "I did A, B, and C and I am OK so I will try this now". Start small. On the first day get out of bed, on the second open the front door and just step outside, etc... Little by little you will gain the strength and confidence you will need to get through some very tough times.
My small victory today has made me forget the heaviness I felt in my heart when I woke up this morning. It will come back of course but the reprieve helps you to keep pushing forward.
As always, feedback, advice, and ideas are welcome.
Much Love
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